Madness

I can feel it creeping in. It hits me at night when I try to sleep but just toss and turn for hours. It hits me when I'm at work and my mind wanders. Some people notice when my eyes glaze over and I seem like a robot. I always notice. I try to reel it in but to no avail. These lines on my wrist tell me I still exist. The hard bumps where the cuts are soothe me far more than any word or touch. The madness is becoming who I am. Or maybe it was always who I was. Maybe I am only just realizing that it exists. I can hear it calling me. Maybe someday I'll give in and indulge myself in it. Maybe someday I'll fall and never return...